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August 27

Two Dogs at the Beach. By Troy, Room 6

DOGS AT THE BEACH
Two excited dogs ready to have a great time.
Waves crashing on the sand.
Running, jumping into the water.
Seagulls swooping down into the ocean.
Dogs enjoying playing together in the ocean.
They were on an adventure in the smashing and crashing ocean. They found some rocks and saw some interesting fish. They were so excited. It was just whitebait! There was a crab. It nipped the dogs foot. “Ouch!” said the white dog. What a great day at the beach. What a tiring day at the beach. What an adventurous day!
By Troy

6 comments |

6 comments:

  1. Josh
    27 August 2012 at 18:25

    You put a picture in my head Troy. That is very descriptive.

  1. Mrs Te Whaiti
    27 August 2012 at 19:03

    Your choice of words made it easy for me to picture those two dogs at the beach, having an adventure. The words 'crashing' and 'smashing' helped me to imagine the sounds I would hear. Well done! I wonder what it would smell like at the beach?

  1. Kaye B
    27 August 2012 at 19:10

    What a great story Troy! You used very descriptive words in your story. I could follow this stpry really easily. I am very proud of you.

  1. GeorgiaB
    27 August 2012 at 19:12

    Wow that was awesome Troy! I love your work.

  1. Sonny
    29 August 2012 at 08:11

    Cool work Troy!

  1. caitlin
    26 September 2012 at 18:50

    very discriptive

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